The Messy Middle: An Invitation When Faith Feels Hard (Ep 01)
You love Jesus. And still, if you’re honest, you’re tired. Maybe things feel quieter than they used to, or heavier than you know how to explain. Maybe there’s a gap between what you’ve prayed for and what your life actually looks like right now. If that’s where you are, you’re not alone.
Welcome to the very first episode of The Purpose Project Podcast. This is a space for Christian women navigating the in-between. That season where faith is still present, but stretched. Where clarity hasn’t come yet. Where the old version of the plan doesn’t quite fit anymore, and certainty is hard to come by. I call it the messy middle, and friend, I’ve lived seasons of my life there.
This episode isn’t about fixing the messy middle or rushing toward answers. It’s about learning to stay present with God right there in it, and discovering that what you’re walking through might just be shaping something in you that nothing else could.
In This Episode, You’ll Discover:
Why this podcast exists and the kind of space it’s here to hold for you.
What the “messy middle” really is and what it isn’t.
Why a quieter, harder, or simply different season doesn’t mean you’re behind or that your faith is failing.
What it looks like to stay connected to God when answers don’t come quickly or easily.
An invitation to come as you are, without pretending and without shame.
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Welcome to The Purpose Project Podcast
Hey, friend. Welcome to The Purpose Project Podcast, where we talk about what it really looks like to live love and lead with purpose and authenticity in the messy middle, that space between where you are and where you want to be. I'm Valerie Jones, a Christian life and leadership coach, and around here we don't do hustle culture, perfectionism, people pleasing, or self-help band-aids. Instead, we're all about biblical truth, brain-based tools and emotional health. So you can walk out your calling with courage, without burning out or sacrificing what matters most. Each episode we'll dive into real life stories, engaging conversations, and relatable teaching moments to help you get out of your head and into the life God's calling you to live. Whether you're navigating change, feeling overwhelmed, craving clarity or just trying to feel like yourself again, take a breath and lean in. You're in the right place. Let's dive in.
You're Not Alone in the Messy Middle
Well, hey, welcome to The Purpose Project podcast. I'm really glad you're here. If you found your way here, it's probably because you love Jesus, but sometimes you still feel tired or unsure or uncertain. Or maybe you're quietly showing up carrying discouragement because there's a huge gap between what you've prayed for and what your life looks like right now.
If that's you, I want you to know you're not alone. There have been so many times in my life where all of those things have been true of me. The messy middle isn't just something that I talk about. It's where I've lived. I've spent so many years in that in-between space. Really all of us have, because so much of our lives happen in that space, in the in between.
And so often our expectations and our reality don't line up in the in-between middle space of life. And that creates a challenge for us. Now, our faith is still very present and active, but it feels hard. It's being stretched and sometimes in ways that permanently change how we show up in the world, and that can be for better or for worse.
When the Calling Gets Hard
There was one season, recently, where this became very real for me. I stepped out of a career and away from a career that was familiar, that I loved, that I was very good at, and into a new executive leadership role that I genuinely believed God led me to. On paper, it looked like an incredible opportunity. It looked like the next right step, and for a while it was good. It really was good, but then something started to feel off.
It was in little ways at first, but then all of a sudden in really big ways, things got incredibly messy and really hard. I couldn't put language to it at first. I just knew that something wasn't right. I could feel it in my body. I could feel it spiritually and emotionally. I was exhausted. I couldn't sleep. And even when I did sleep, it didn't help. I was anxious. I was constantly second guessing myself, and physically sick in ways that just didn't make any sense. All the while I was doing all the right things, showing up, doing a really good job. From the outside, everything looked okay. I was leading, being responsible, checking all the boxes, but internally, inside, I was really disoriented.
My nervous system was on high alert constantly. And I remember thinking more than once during this season, this is not what I expected this to look like at all. We're gonna talk about those kinds of things here, but I want to make it clear that this isn't necessarily a space where we're gonna fix that or tidy up all the loose ends or put a bow on something that can't really be neatly packaged or easily explained.
What This Podcast Is — and Isn't
What I do want to do here is name those things, hold space for them. I want you to understand why the podcast exists, what I'm here to do, and how I hope to serve you. I am not coming from a place of having it all figured out because I don't. None of us do. But I have learned some really important lessons. One of those being how important it is to stay present with the Lord and with each other in every season that we're in. We're gonna talk about what that looks like. What does it mean to stay connected with God when answers don't come quickly or easily?
I didn't start this podcast because I reached some new level of clarity or have some new big idea that's gonna explain away all of our suffering and all of our disappointment. There's nothing new. There are biblical truths that we're gonna talk about that have been around from the beginning of time. But I started the podcast because I've lived long enough to know both in my own life, walking with other women that our faith is often formed in places we wouldn't choose to be in; and so is our character. And those things shape our leadership. They determine how we show up in the world.
The Women I'm Here For
Over the years, I've met so many Christian women who really love Jesus deeply. Women who are faithful, and thoughtful and sincere, and gifted and skilled. But they're quietly also carrying insecurity or grief, disappointment or uncertainty that they don't quite know what to do with and they don't feel permission to talk about. I've been there.
When things started to unravel for me at work. There were things that I didn't feel okay saying out loud. It's not because I didn't trust God, but it's because I didn't know how to reconcile what I was experiencing in that situation with what I believed to be true. I didn't doubt God, but I could not make sense of what was happening, especially at the hands of other believers.
I was constantly second guessing myself. I was second guessing my calling, my capacity for discernment, my purpose. In fact, I almost quit believing that I had any purpose at all, that the Lord had somehow changed his mind about me, and I had gotten it terribly wrong. I almost forgot who I am in Christ. I almost forgot what it looks like to be brave.
And I kept wondering all along, what am I missing? How did I get this so wrong? What is wrong with me? Why is this so hard if I'm doing what God asked me to do?
Does that sound at all familiar? I know I'm not the only one who's ever asked those kinds of questions.
Hard Seasons Don't Disqualify You
Sometimes we ask them in response to loss. Sometimes it's because our assignment or our calling seems to be changing. Sometimes it's because we find ourselves in a season that lasts way longer than we expected, or it ended way before we were ready. Sometimes we're in an environment that slowly erodes our sense of self and we stay longer than we're meant to.
What I've learned, personally, professionally, and through years of ministry, is that those moments don't define us and they don't disqualify us. They do work to deepen our faith. They do work to make us more resilient. They can actually make us better humans, but only if we're willing to handle disappointment and setbacks in those difficult seasons, God's way. Only if we stay honest with the Lord about those things, only if we're willing to be honest with ourselves and with trusted people in our community.
This podcast exists because I know that God meets us, not after we've figured it all out and made sense of our story, but while we're still living it. He meets us right in the middle of it, and he brings perspective and meaning.
No Spiritual Bypassing Here
Around here, we are not about spiritual bypassing. We're not about toxic positivity. We're not about rushing toward resolutions or fixing everything that's wrong, and we're certainly not about presenting this polished or performative version of our faith. There is no fake it until you make it here. That's not what we're doing, but this is a place where faith and emotional health and spiritual maturity are allowed to exist together without competing with one another.
And one of the hardest parts of that leadership season when things started to unravel for me, wasn't just the exhaustion or the sickness, and it was this pressure. It was this pressure that I felt to explain myself. It was this pressure to defend my decisions; this pressure that I felt to strive to make something work that wasn't meant for me anymore. And then on top of that, I had this immense pressure to make it all make sense — for other people and for myself. What I was reminded of in that season is that our faith doesn't always come with certainty or clarity in the moment. Sometimes it comes with an invitation to stay present, to lean in, even when the story isn't finished and the outcome isn't clear.
Isn't that the essence of faith?
What We'll Talk About Here
We're gonna talk honestly about that, about what it looks like. We're gonna talk about the internal work that we need to be doing with the help of the Holy Spirit, especially as believers and as leaders. We're gonna talk about discernment, about grief, about waiting, about unmet expectations. We're gonna talk about obedience that costs more than we expected. We're gonna talk about renewing your mind without denying your emotions, because feelings all by themselves aren't good or bad. It's our response to those feelings that matters. We have to steward our emotional health just like anything else, and we get to choose and we're accountable for those choices.
Now, I won't always offer answers here or solutions to your problems to fix everything that's wrong, but I will promise to be present with you. I promise to honor what it means to be human. And to hold space for the complexity and the nuance of the lives that we're living every day, real life.
An Invitation from Jesus
In Matthew chapter 11, verse 28 through 30, Jesus says, "Are you tired, worn out, burned out on religion? Come to me, get away with me, and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest, walk with me and work with me. Watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything ill-fitting or heavy on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn how to live freely and lightly."
I love that passage of scripture so much.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. Keep company with me and you'll learn how to live freely and lightly. You know, those words aren't a command to have it all together to get your life in ship shape. This is an invitation. It's a beautiful invitation to come close, to stop striving. To stop carrying things that you are never meant to carry alone.
When I read that passage, I don't see Jesus saying, "Hey, you've got to figure it out." He's saying, "Stay with me. Be with me." And that's what I had to do.
Maybe that's what you need to hear today too.
Where You Are Is Not Where You'll Stay
If you're listening and you're in a season where your life feels off. Maybe things are quieter than they used to be, or maybe it's more overwhelming than you want it to be, or things feel heavier than you know how to explain. Maybe it's simply just different than what you imagined with every prayer that you've prayed in the most recent months.
Whatever the season, what if we took Jesus's invitation seriously and committed to stay the course, to lean in, to come near? What if what's challenging for you right now is actually an invitation to deeper faith? Friend, where you are right now is not where you'll be forever. But it might be where God has something for you that you wouldn't otherwise find something that you can't find anywhere else.
And know this, your faith is not failing just because it feels hard. Here's what I can say, with absolute certainty, God wastes nothing. Not one moment of your story is lost on him.
Sometimes what he has for us shows up in unexpected ways, and we can miss it if we insist on rushing past what's hard. These seasons have a way of stripping away what no longer fits, what is no longer good for us. These seasons have a way of loosening our grip on what we thought we needed. They invite us into a kind of trust that can't be rushed or manufactured. And we can grow and actually thrive through these seasons, not by forcing answers or outcomes, not by rushing through lessons to be learned, but by leaning in and allowing the Lord to deepen our faith in unexpected ways.
A Moment to Pause
Now, before you move on with your day, I want to invite you to just pause with me here for a moment. If you're in a place where you can take a slow, deep breath in and out. Please know there is no fixing for you to do right now. There's no decision that you need to make right now. Just be here.
I want to ask you this question: What part of your life feels like the messy middle right now?
Maybe it's a relationship, maybe it's work or a job. Maybe it's your health. Maybe it's your calling or a season that you thought would look entirely different than it does. Whatever it is that comes to mind, simply name it without judgment and without trying to fix it, and then whisper this prayer with me.
God, this is where I am, and I'm choosing to trust that you're with me and because you're with me, I have all that I need.
Now friends, take one more slow, deep breath in and exhale.
One Commitment
As we wrap up this first episode, I want to ask you to commit to one thing with me. Be present. When you show up here, you're invited to show up honestly just as you are and to listen with an open heart and an open mind. I'm praying that these words meet you right where you are, that you find something here just for you.
The stories in the conversations that you're going to hear are designed to help you gain clarity. Yes, but without pressure. Here is no pressure to perform or to compare or to compete. We're gonna leave that behind. But I do want to encourage you to lean in with curiosity, to have self-compassion and be full of faith.
For today, I want to leave you with this. You don't have to have it all together. Healing can't be rushed because healing is hard work. But friend, you don't have to walk through this season alone.
If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to follow the podcast and join me again next time.
Until Next Time
Hey friend, thanks for tuning in to the Purpose Project podcast. I hope today's conversation helped you feel seen and a little less alone in the messy middle of life. If this episode encouraged you, would you take a second to share it with a friend or leave a quick review. That will help other women who need hope and encouragement find this space, and it truly means the world to me.
You can always find free resources, or join the email list by visiting my website, thepurposeproject.us. Remember, friend, you were created on purpose and for a purpose. Until next time, be brave and eyes on Jesus.
Meet Your Host
I’m Valerie Jones, a Christian Life & Leadership Coach and the host of The Purpose Project Podcast. I created this space for Christian women who are navigating the messy middle: those in-between seasons where faith is real but stretched, and life doesn’t look the way you expected.
My approach is rooted in biblical truth, emotional health, and brain-based methods because I believe God designed us as whole people, and transformation and personal growth should consider our whole selves.
“You don’t have to have it all together. You can’t rush healing — healing is hard work. And you don’t have to walk this season alone.”
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